Vinegar and Honey

For many years I’ve been apprehensive to take on any leadership position where other people were involved. For years I’ve been told I steamroll, I am controlling, or been given unhelpful advice from people close to me, like my mom saying “you catch more flies with honey than vinegar” with the insinuation being that is me…. Just vinegar.  I responded by conflating it to that’s who I am. Harsh. Controlling. Hurtful. Mean. Eventually I just withdrew from anywhere with a group. I withdrew from talking with people. I arranged my life to not need to be in a management position anywhere. It has been a process shifting the beliefs of who I am. 

I just finished up a weekend leading a team for Atlas Project ATX8 weekend. Leadership is seeing masterpiece and bringing it forth. I think this has been a different angle for me, as many times I’ve gauged leadership by getting things done.  I can get things done, but alienate people.  I can get things done, but the doing doesn’t feel nearly as fulfilling as knowing that while we did it, I also brought the best out in everyone around me.  Leadership is bringing alive the leadership in others, shining the light on what is there, bringing alive the beauty they are and the beauty they bring out in the world around them. 

I am depleted physically and emotionally right now, and also so fucking proud of myself.  My feedback now is “You call, I’m there. Just let me know when!” … and “You’ve changed my life, I’ll love you forever.”… and that I have “structured, loving leadership”.  I faced everything head on and shifted who I am, and kept on shifting.  When I stopped coming from avoidance and come from vision instead, leadership began changing shape. When I come from seeing the leaders in front of me and enrolling them in vision with me… life changed, I changed. 

Not just for this reason, but for many … I love me. I love who I am as a mother, as a daughter, as a leader, as a sister, and me with me.

I am Rachel Wipf. I am a caring, generous, loving leader.  I am a resilient, creative badass and a light in the world. My voice matters. I matter. My life matters and I love making sure people around me know they matter too.