Tattered

 Tattered heart

Heavy and cold

There is never a question of my love for you

Or my need

For your love

Curled in a ball

Bound by guilt and shame

At who I am

And who I've been

Numb to the pain

But is it real? 

This question begs

Layers of distress

Burdens of fear

Unable to sort reality from guilt

Voices echo

Are they real? 

Or old guilt

Blinding me from the light

Finding footings to move forward

With strength and courage 

Feels too heavy

Too soon

Too much

Pain slipping through the cracks

Of the numbness that keeps me safe 

And yet the horizon

Cannot stay dark

Golden rays will reach me

Curled in torment

Bring embers of hope

Back to my soul

To fill the void

With life

Again